


heroes (we could be)

by avalanches



Series: we'll be counting stars [3]
Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Enforcer!Shizuo, Information Analyst!Izaya, M/M, Psycho Pass AU, alternative universe - psycho pass, idk most of this is in prose idk why
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-11
Updated: 2016-01-11
Packaged: 2018-05-13 05:57:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5697556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avalanches/pseuds/avalanches
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'I think, sometimes, we could be heroes.'</p><p>'Heroes save people, we don't, Shizu-chan."</p><p>"You saved me."</p>
            </blockquote>





	heroes (we could be)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wingsatmidnight](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wingsatmidnight/gifts).



> so, i needed a psycho pass au for shizaya, and i decided to write it at 11 pm at night because i'm suffering from anxiety over my A level results
> 
> i'm sorry i have not finished the diarkay, but i hope this is good enough heheeheee /runs away from responsibilities (a.k.a. diarkay fics)
> 
> prompt: ‘we could be heroes, we could be”  
> alternate universe: psycho pass alternate universe with Enforcer!Shizuo and Information Analyst!Izaya

The first time Shizuo kissed Izaya was when they were sixteen and in high school.

Shizuo’s hue was still clear and they were madly in love, or at least he was sure that he was. He hadn’t started throwing things around, he hadn’t lost his parents, and he had Izaya wrapped up in his arms during the entire Golden Week. He had Izaya splayed out on crisp cotton sheets in a cabin in the middle of a forest, their breaths mingling in liquid pleasure as the raven threw back his head in ecstasy to expose the pale curve of his throat.

It had been so easy to glue his lips to that delicate arc and mouth at the raven’s Adam’s apple with sharp nails biting into his back, scrabbling to find purchase amongst tangled sheets and sweat-slicked bodies.

It’s not so easy now though, he thinks as he smokes his third cigarette of the day and watches the raven tapping away at his computer from behind his sunglasses.

The porcelain throat is hidden by the fur-lined neck of the black parka that Izaya wears, and his face is set in one of concentration as he clicks through the information rapidly appearing on the screen to process everything. Izaya’s the best information analyst the department has, and he hasn’t done field work since he got promoted and the Dominator’s been taken off his hands.

Shizuo, on the other hand, goes out in the field far too often due to his super strength, accelerated healing and his experience in the field. He goes out with scars still healing, bones still mending and comes back with more, regardless of the plans that Inspector Tom tries to come up with. He comes back broken, battered and bruised, while Izaya sits at a computer straining his eyes reading through millions of words, processing pages of information and forgetting sleep in the process.

They have different jobs and they hardly see each other, not with the amount of time that their jobs take up.

Izaya had joined for Shizuo, stated that “Shizu-chan needs the company”, regardless of the fact that they had broken up two years ago when Shizuo had been declared a latent criminal after critically injuring the thugs that had killed his parents and burnt their house down. Shizuo had been pulled out of university, dumped into training to become an Enforcer, and proceeded to go through endless experiments until the Bureau had deemed him less of a threat. He had been an Enforcer for one year, working with Tom until a pale, lithe figure that was all too familiar appeared in the doorway.

Izaya didn’t stay an Inspector for long; his real talent in information processing and analysing was discovered and he was immediately shipped off to begin his new job a week into him holding the Dominator. Shizuo had refused to talk to him, or even go into the information processing room because every single time he set eyes on the raven, he just didn’t know what to do.

Izaya didn’t talk to him much either, merely acknowledging him when needed, otherwise keeping his eyes trained on the computer or his phone, completely engrossed in his job.

Here they are, hidden in a dimly lit room at the base of an abandoned building, where Izaya is hacking into a line belonging to a society suspected of housing people whose Crime Coefficients have completely gone berserk, aiming to tame them and use them to commit crimes. Shizuo had been sent along as protection, a dull throbbing in his still-healing leg where he fractured it last week

It’s awkward, because they haven’t spoken properly since they broke up and Shizuo had been sent away.

Izaya closes the laptop and swallows gingerly, like the movement hurts his throat. He doesn’t turn around, doesn’t say anything, but Shizuo sees the tension in the stiff line of his shoulders, where his jet-black hair curls around the fur that lines his expensive parka.

“We should talk.”

His own voice sounds hoarse, like he hasn’t spoken in months. He doesn’t know where to start, because Izaya’s a maze to start with, an unsolvable Rubik’s cube where the colours don’t match up regardless of how you twist it. He always doesn’t know where to start, like the time where Izaya’s shirt is open and his pants down to his ankles, raven hair a halo on the white pillows and thin legs splayed open to accommodate him. He didn’t know where to start, what to do, and the words die on his lips when Izaya lifts dark red eyes to meet his.

It’s deja vu, he thinks, when Izaya turns around slowly to face him, his lips pressed tightly together and the tension clear in the set of his jaw.

“There’s nothing to talk about, you protozoan.”

Izaya’s voice is quiet, a stark contrast to the arrogant cocky tone that he adopts around their other colleagues. He chats with Shinra from the science faction, laughs with Shiki from the reconnaissance section and grins playfully at Namie from administration. He doesn’t do that now, the low tone barely reaching Shizuo’s ears and he stays where he is, hands placed on the laptop as they wait for the signal for them to move.

Shizuo holds his gaze, his hands clenching into fists at his side, then unclenching again as he tries to get the words out of his throat. He fails, and Izaya turns back around, his hands fiddling with the edge of the laptop while he himself clenches his teeth together and checks his watch, waiting for the signal to come through.

“I think, sometimes, we could be heroes.”

Izaya barks out a harsh laugh and slides the laptop into the sling bag, zipping it up and looping the sling over his head. He stands up and dusts off his pants, blowing his dark bangs out of his face.

“Heroes save people. We don’t, Shizu-chan.”

The nickname rolls off Izaya’s lips easily, and Shizuo almost slips right there, his throat tightening at the familiar phrase and he almost comes undone. He holds his tears back, turns his face away from the information analyst and eyes the dusty corner of the empty room. He thinks he can’t say the words, but they slip right out his mouth like the tear that slips out of his left eye and rolls onto his cheek.

“You saved me.”

Izaya doesn’t respond, and Shizuo doesn’t turn around to check. He wipes away the tear and reaches one hand back to grasp the barrel of the Dominator tucked into the back of his pants, feeling the cool metal on his palm.

“You were all I thought about when they made me go through Enforcer training,” he swallows and resolves not to cry. He keeps his eyes on that dusty corner, watching his watch from the corner of his left eye and resting his finger on the trigger of the Dominator. “I thought about you so much, but I thought I would never see you again. I wanted to talk to you, but I--” he cuts himself off and shakes his head, keeping his hand clenched around the reassuring weight of the Dominator.

“I couldn’t either.”

Shizuo’s head snaps around to stare at the raven information analyst standing there, hugging the laptop to his chest, his dark ruby eyes staring directly at the Enforcer. Shizuo loses all his breath right there, because Izaya has never looked so _beautiful_. In the dim light, his gaze is strong and certain, but his hands on the laptop case are shaking, but still he holds firm and unwavering like he’s decided.

“It’s both of us, Shizu-chan,” again with the familiar nickname, the term of endearment that Shizuo had clung onto with his entire life. Izaya watches him carefully for a while before taking a cautious step towards him. Shizuo doesn’t move, he can’t move (you can, the voice reminds him spitefully in his head), and he watches Izaya come closer to him, until they are face to face and looking into each others’ eyes.

“We’re idiots, Shizu-chan,” breathes Izaya, reaching out with one hand to gently press against the side of of Shizuo’s face, his hand trembling but his eyes steady.

“I love you.”

Shizuo chokes on his words, the tears spilling down his cheeks, and he turns his face into Izaya’s palm. It’s warm and he remembers Izaya’s touch, and he doesn’t care if Izaya doesn’t love him anymore.

Suddenly, Izaya’s there and cradling his face and a lot closer and Shizuo reaches out blindly to grab the thin waist like a drowning man would do to a float in the middle of a turbulent sea. That sea is his emotions right now, and he’s being tossed about by them. He’s a drowning man, struggling to breathe under all the emotions he’s feeling, being overwhelmed, especially by the love he has for his man in front of him.

“Like I said, we’re idiots, Shizu-chan.”

Izaya’s the safety line reeling him back to dry land, pulling him into his arms and pressing his forehead against Shizuo’s. He vaguely registers tears sliding down Izaya’s face too, the dark red gaze turning tender, and their lips are pressed against each other, gentle and yet also desperate, yearning for a feeling thought to be lost two years ago.

They’re kissing, and oh, Shizuo doesn’t know how he’s supposed to feel as he winds his arms tighter around Izaya’s spindly waist and tilts his face to slide a tongue between pale, chapped lips. Izaya gasps into his mouth, claws at his t-shirt, and welcomes the intrusion with a soft moan that turns his insides to mush. They are wrapped around each other, and Shizuo feels like he’s in a movie, because he hardly believes it, but the gentle press of Izaya’s body against his and the pressure on his starched shirt reminds him that this is real.

 _It’s real_ , he thinks as they break apart, and he cups Izaya’s face tendering, brushing his lips over the twin trails of moisture. Izaya lets out a mewl and he leans up to kiss away the tears on Shizuo’s cheek as well. After he’s done, he wraps his arms tightly around the Enforcer and sighs contentedly into his chest.

The beeping of Shizuo’s watch draws their attention and Shizuo draws out the Dominator, one hand still wrapped around Izaya’s waist, reluctant to let go. Izaya laughs quietly, sharp eyes meeting Shizuo’s mocha ones and he leans up to kiss the corner of his mouth.

“C’mon, be my hero, Shizu-chan.”

The affectionate nickname fills Shizuo with joy, and his chest tightens with an indescribable feeling as he looks down on raven, a smirk creeping onto his lips. He hasn’t felt the thrill of the job in a very long time.

“It’s my turn now, I guess?”

Izaya hums non-comitantly, one hand going to grip the laptop bag slung at his side.

“You’ve always been.”

When Shizuo bursts out of the door and hurtles down the alley designated as their evacuation route, all he can think about is the sharp curve of Izaya’s body against his, and the need to kiss him senseless when they get back safely to headquarters.

Those had been the only two thoughts running through his mind when he had decided to kiss Izaya on the rooftop when they were sixteen five years ago, in their first year of high school before Shizuo’s hue turned cloudy.

It hasn’t made him love Orihara Izaya any less.


End file.
